2011 feb 27, Sunday ♥

Hey bloggie, its been long time i dint updated you. 

I promise to updated you daily but i din, im sorry :/

Well, this couple months is so busy and form3 is freak me out :/

So much to study, so much to learn, homework nvr finished.

Every week i need tuition and tuition again.

Because i know im slow than everyone, im not smart.

So i need to do more than everyone.

I can't blame, because i nvr pay attention whn im form1 and form2.

So form3 need to study more harder.

hmph.

Fine, tht's not the only thing freak me out.

Someone, hr tried to hold me on.

And he tried to make me hold him on too.

But im so confused because i don't trusted.

I know i shouldn't think about this right now.

But its keep going in my mind.

What can i do?

I started to don't understand what i really wanted right now.

I miss him everyday.

I love him more than i did before, but i can't find anything to hold on.

Im not fucking perfect.

I tried to live without him, but tears fall from my eyes.

I look to the star in the sky every night, i hope it can help me.

I pray to the god everyday and i hope he can tell me how to make it right.

But all doesn't help :/

Nothing's change.

He say he get deeper everyday, he say i always let him to hold on.

But i don't know what to do even he say something or do something tht everyone think it was romantic or touching.

Im lonely every night, talking to my pillow.

my pillow is the only one i can share with.

The only one can wipe my tears.

Im alone and i feel empty.

I did miss him.

Everydayyyy....

The first exam is coming after a week.

And i havent prepare for it.

What the hell im doing right now.

Thinking something tht nonsense.

I closed my eyes and pray and i trusted what justin bieber say "i close my eyes and i can see a better day"

if i fail the first exam, my teachers and my parents would kill me.

Grr :/

But can i do tht and nvr disappointed everyone tht put a hope on me?

Im stress im nervous, im not smart like what they think, im just lucky sometimes.

Haih.

Prayyyy for the exam, pray for my broken heart getting well soon, pray for everything :')

Be confident, trust myself :')